Bits That Never Made It
Dave @ October 19, 2008 # 11 Comments
Everything published goes through an editing process and as such, things get cut. Here are a bunch of things that didn’t make it into my Cracked.com articles.
Generation Gap: 5 Ways Childhood Has Changed
Dave @ August 20, 2008 # 3 Comments
The Gentleman’s Handbook reminds you of those halcyon days of yore. And what retards kids these days are.
Hungover With Dave (featuring Dave)
Dave @ August 11, 2008 # No Comment Yet
“I’m hungover. Feels fucking bad. Never gonna drink again.”
The Big Question: Is it best to Excuse Oneself or to Crap In Your Pants?
Dave @ August 6, 2008 # 3 Comments
The Gentleman’s Handbook asnwers the Big Question: Is it better to excuse yourself and crap, thus missing out on potential excitement, or to crap yourself regardless, with nary a thought about your dry cleaning bills.
A Short Film About Trousers
Dave @ July 28, 2008 # 4 Comments
The Gentleman’s Handbook attempts to prove that Trousers are the funniest item of clothing.
How To Operate A Telephone
Dave @ July 15, 2008 # 3 Comments
The Gentleman’s Handbook teaches you how to use your brand new Telephone without having to leave the comfort of your expensive yet tasteful Afhgan armchair.
Dear Sir: Retirement
Dave @ July 15, 2008 # No Comment Yet
It’s always hard when one has to choose between upholding the honour of the country of his birth and having more time to play football in the park.
Sex With Women: Old Reigate Town
Dave @ July 15, 2008 # No Comment Yet
As I walked out in Old Reigate Town
My master of cricket approached me with a frown
And he said Sonny, you’ve not had a pony today
In Old Reigate Town
Dear Sir: Paramore
Dave @ July 15, 2008 # No Comment Yet
Finding a wife by using a maths-based system ofy working out the age of someone you’re legally allowed to fancy.
Sex With Women: Send Simmons!
Dave @ July 15, 2008 # No Comment Yet
Send for Simmons, he’s your man, send for Simmons!
Send for Simmons, he’s your man, send for Simmons!
Send for Simmons, he’s your man, he’s got a penis!
